According to Yogi Berra, The Tender Bar is “déjà vu all over again.” It is nothing more than a “young man’s coming-of-age story” you have seen several times before. In the poster, it says “a feel good movie”, but the question is, who feels good? Not the average audience, that’s for sure, as this worn-out material has been used so many times that it’s predictable. Could it be the characters, a “lovable” group of losers who always get more than they deserve? Or perhaps it’s the novelist, a Pulitzer Prize winner, whose book the movie is based on? Or could it be George Clooney, the director who clearly has no interest in this work, as seen in his frames.
It is now the age of the uncle movie, and their influential characters are all stereotypical. In Uncle Frank, we have a cool, gay uncle whereas the uncle in C’mon C’mon is wholehearted and sensitive. In The Tender Bar, audiences see a forthright and honest uncle with his true self being infected by nostalgia. He is the type of tough guy that always swears in front of you, promises to always be straightforward and gives you romantic advice that doesn’t work at all. He can even get the everlasting gobstopper crap any time he wants, and you never doubt your affection for his toughness. In your memory, he is fond, and he played such an important role in your young life, and that affection outweighs any edges you may recall as a grown-up.
The uncle in The Tender Bar is played by Ben Affleck, which made me mistake that the movie happened in Boston. Uncle Ben, or Uncle Charlie (his christened name), has a bar on Long Island named The Dickens Bar. Uncle Charlie doesn’t kill people and frighten his sister’s child like Joseph Cotton’s better-known namesake from Shadow of a Doubt, which could have raised the star rating. But instead, he teaches his young nephew JR how to be a decent man. JR needs these lessons because, you may guess it, he’s got some daddy issues as his Papa, a radio DJ with the nickname “The Voice” (Max Martini), is not there for him. He spends any amount of time he could set aside listening to the DJ while he and his mother (Lily Rabe) wonder about his whereabouts. It shouldn’t be such a big deal, given that by 1973, all radio stations had call letters and facilities. Whenever The Voice speaks, people immediately knock the radio over and beat it to pieces. They must have plenty of radios to smash.
It doesn’t stop “The Voice” from showing up. He appears from time to time to let the young JR (played by an excellent newbie, Daniel Ranieri) down, and to exasperate his older version, who is starred by Tye Sheridan with so little effort as the way the director establishes his role. One of the many running jokes that is not very funny (but could be an amazing drinking game to kill your time) is the response to JR’s self-introduction. “What does JR stand for?” they always ask. It is never answered. Another lame running joke is about Uncle Charlie and how he gets pissed off any time he hears The Voice, it is obvious that he owes Charlie 30 dollars. It always reminds me of the angry paperboy in Better Off Dead, who keeps shouting “I want my two dollars!!” whenever he has sight of John Cusack. But he is luckier than Uncle Charlie for not getting beaten up.
Mom wants JR to attend Yale. No one thinks he can do it, especially Grandpa (Christopher Lloyd). Grandpa would rather Mom, JR and Uncle Charlie leave his house. He replies “You keep coming back!” to Mom’s complaints of how he is such a terrible father. These scenes are like a bad sitcom. I have no idea how much of J.R. Moehringer’s memoir was kept in William Monahan’s script, but hopefully the book is more substantive and less of a cliché. It is easily predicted that JR will get into Yale and fall in love with a wealthy woman who looks down on his blue collar heart, and will fulfill his writing dream though the New York Times has fired him. The reason is understandable, because much like this movie itself, most of JR’s news is about The Dickens Bar.
My notes for The Tender Bar start with “Narration!”, which I was frustrated to underline three times. Unless it is a film noir or Morgan Freeman is singing the soundtrack, the story far too often embodies lazy writing. It is indeed a memoir, but when JR tells nothing new, his voice on the soundtrack just becomes meaningless. To worsen the situation, while Ranieri’s eyes are full of wonder and admiration in all of his scenes, Sheridan’s acting couldn’t evoke any response from the audience, even in the final confrontation with The Voice (which is unnecessarily vicious). It seems that by a remarkably familiar plot, The Tender Bar’s filmmakers were expecting viewers to help them do the heavy work of delivering emotions.
At least Affleck is doing a great job turning an unappreciated character into a much more memorable one. I wouldn’t want him as my uncle but rather my bartender, for me being a dive bar lover. He plays with his indecent dialogue and the chemistry with the regulars, such as Max Casella and Michael Braun, is really good. This role can be nominated for the Oscar more easily than another role of Affleck which is more deserving, so it is not so surprising if the actor joins the nomination. Much like every detail in The Tender Bar, it is foreseeable.
The Tender Bar is now playing in select theaters and will arrive on Amazon on January 7th.
